Relationships for Dummies

I have put together my own perception of what I think makes or breaks a relationship.

    What makes a relationship work is something not a lot of us are aware of. A lot of us are so caught up in our own little world with our own problems, when we are in a relationship; we tend to “forget” about the other person. We forget about their needs and wants. That other person may be dealing with their own issues as well, and may need you the most at this time and vice versa. We must remember that we need to be there for each other even during those tough times. That is what makes a relationship stronger.

    We also have to learn all we can about each other. It can be anything from your favorite color, to your hopes and dreams for the future. Ask him/her what he/she likes on his/her pizza, what he/she does for a living, and where he/she is ticklish. If you are dating someone, wouldn’t you want to know all you can about that person? If you do not ask these things, the other person will think you really are not that interested, and frankly, you probably are not.

    In the beginning of a relationship, you want to find out as much as you can about that other person so you can evaluate your potential with this person. If you are not compatible, then it will not work. In order to find out if you are compatible, you need to ask these and other questions to find out what kind of person they are. You also need to spend a good amount of time with this person as well. How can you get to know someone if you only see them a few times a month? Not possible.

    Sex plays a very important part as well. It is probably one of the most important parts. I know there is a lot more to a relationship than just sex, but it is the “bee’s knee’s” or the “icing on the cake” so to speak. I am not one to jump into sex early on in the relationship. I want to see if I am compatible with the person first. I do not know the time line for something like this, as every one is different. I DO know that normally it does not take more than a month or two. After two months, if you are not taking the relationship to the next level, sex, either he or she is not interested, or there may be some other underlying issue present. Maybe they are embarrassed with themselves for some reason, or they just cannot “perform” sexually. Now, this is where communication comes in. This is another important part of a relationship. If there is no communication---- THERE IS NO RELATIONSHIP. Final. End it now before either one of you "invested" too much time into it. There is nothing worse than investing your time, your feelings, as well as your heart into a relationship only to find out they were not really interested in you to begin with. What a waste of time.